Expectations in relationships, but the reality is …..


Are you someone who is into this exaggerating romance Bollywood movies or songs? Do you expect your partner or boyfriend to treat you like a queen? Do you always expect something from your loved ones say, friends or relatives?  How do you really feel when your expectations are not fulfilled?

Psychologically, human beings have a natural tendency to have expectations from their closed ones. We want the expectation to be fulfilled to experience the excitement it leaves us with. Contradictorily, we feel disappointed or heartbroken when the expectation is not fulfilled.



Don’t you think there should be a good reason to validate your expectation? Despite having a good reason, if the individual doesn’t entertain what you expected leaves you with resentments. Let’s consider two situations.

You were always there for your bestie during an emergency situation. When a similar situation occurs to you, you seek help from your bestie. She helps you in solving the problem. You expected a supporting hand from your friend which is fulfilled. Mutual understanding and trust are developed creating a long-lasting friendship.

In this scenario, it’s between two people who have fallen in love. The girl is very giving and does a lot for her boyfriend. She travels to meet him often irrespective of the far distance, buys gifts and food, etc. She would have at least basic expectations from the boy. The boy does notice and feels her love. But he doesn’t entertain seeing the girl or communicating often. This leaves the girl in resentment. Their relationship might not last long and ends up in a painful separation.



So how do we deal with this problem? The only solution for not experiencing resentment in life is to not expect or expect little as we are not aware of what the reality is. Reality is 99% different from what we expect in life. When you are given more than what you expected leaves you with immense happiness. When nothing is given, you don’t feel anything. When your heart commands you to expect, your mind should automatically control you to not expect. Your mind should be the decision maker and not your heart in this case.

Help others without any reason and give without the expectation of receiving anything in return!!!

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